Reprogramming the Elephant

I recently listened to a talk about the concept of the subconscious vs. the conscious mind. In the speech by Orrin Woodward, he refers to the book The Ant and the Elephant: Leadership For the Self by Vince Poscente. I have yet to read the book but it is definitely on the must-read list.

The basic idea is that as humans, we have so much untapped potential in our subconscious minds. The subconscious mind fires something like 4 billion neurons per second while the conscious mind fires approximately 2,000 neurons per second. The author compares the subconscious with all this activity to an elephant while the conscious mind is likened to an ant.

How do we tap into that powerful potential of our elephants? When you think about how much an elephant eats compared to an ant, you can easily understand that our elephants eat everyday, whether or not WE feed it. Our minds are constantly being programmed with images, ideas, scripting, etc. Take for example watching the television. Images are constantly flashing on our mind's eye with words and ideas. Just the thought makes me feel vulnerable.

I remember after serving a mission for my church, some friends took me to a movie. It was one of the "Mission Impossible" movies and I just remember feeling assaulted. It was an overload of visual chaos to me after not having watched any kind of show for almost 2 years.

Media is not the only food we feed our elephants. Each of us has a script running through our minds. We are constantly creating our story by the way we think of ourselves, our relationships and surroundings, etc. Have you ever stopped to think, "What am I thinking?"

In order to tap into the power of the elephant and get him to do what our ant wants, we need to reprogram him. Positive affirmations are one way we can do this. I pay attention to my negative scripting and then rewrite my story according to what I really want. Then I read them to myself at least once a day.

My husband and I also have a HUGE vision board on the wall in our room with images that show our affirmations. We started writing things on our mirror 10 years ago when we wanted to move back to the west to be near my father-in-law who was in poor health. We posted a map with stickers on the cities we would like to live and we wrote on it: "We are back in the west by Oct. 2003". Within a month of that date we were moving into our new house in one of the cities with a sticker on it.

Reprogramming the elephant really works. I want to be in charge of what I put into my mind! Imagine what we can do if the elephant and the ant worked together to accomplish our personal purposes while we are here on earth. I can see the ant riding the elephant right now...I got another image for my vision board!

Consistency

It's 8:22 am, I haven't finished my Morning Routine from my previous post, and I'm rushing to write a post so that I can begin our Morning Devotional on time. I take great comfort in a journal entry by John Adams recorded on July 21, 1756:

I am resolved to rise with the sun and to study Scriptures on Thursday, Friday, Saturday, and Sunday mornings, and to study some Latin author the other three mornings. Noons and nights I intend to read English authors....I will rouse up my mind and fix my attention. I will stand collected within myself and think upon what I read and what I see. I will strive with all my soul to be something more than persons who have had less advantages than myself.

But the next morning he slept until seven and a one-line entry the following week read, "A very rainy day. Dreamed away the time." (McCullough, John Adams, p. 41)

He became a great statesman so I am hoping there is a wide margin for error : )

Habits

Aristotle said, "We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit." What kind of habits do we have? Are they leading us toward excellence or mediocrity?

In Noah Websters 1828 Dictionary, habit is defined as "a disposition or condition of the mind or body acquired by custom or a frequent repetition of the same act. Habit is that which is held or retained, the effect of custom or frequent repetition."

I take heart in this definition since the "condition of the mind or body" are faculties over which we have control. We do not have to become victims to our default habits. We have power to create habits that will lead us to success.

How do you know which habits to make? That may seem like a simple question, but LEMI offers a whole conference call on "Forms". A form is a model, system or pattern. Simply stated a form is the way we do things. Once I learned about forms, all of a sudden they started to pop up all over the place.

We see different ways to govern, ways we handle the preparation of food, ways we get up in the morning, ways we clean the house, etc. The reason this is so crucial is because seeing forms allows us to proactively create success-leading habits. First we need to define what kind of form we are operating under. For example, how do we govern our homes and family? If we find ourselves yelling and ordering everyone around, then we can zoom out and realize the form of government we are following is akin to a dictatorship. Once recognized we can align our behavior with the form of government we desire in our home.

Since I'm in love with Fly Lady's system, I will use that as an example. What she does in essence is give those willing to be mentored a system or form for cleaning our homes. She has created a Morning Routine (to which I added some of my own) that I follow everyday (or almost everyday ; )

Morning Routine:

Plan

Read Scriptures & Pray

Exercise for Well Being

Get Dressed from head to toe, including make-up and brushing teeth

Swish & Swipe (1-2 minute wipe down of bathroom)

Check Calendar

Unload Dishwasher

Reboot Laundry (sort, wash, dry, fold, put away one load)

After following this routine for 4 months, it has started to become my own. I realized this morning that these habits I am creating help set the proper tone for my entire day. They are habits that lead me to success.

As I develop these success-promoting habits, I naturally turn to my children to help them establish good habits of their own. Then it hit me! That is really the Core (yes as in Core Phase : ) of a Thomas Jefferson Education. We are not trying to fill their minds with all sorts of facts, we are teaching them excellent habits that help to create the inspiring environment that will ignite their fire of curiosity and learning.

If you don't like the way your morning goes or how you handle the dinner hour, simply zoom out and recognize what form you follow. Then choose which form you would like and begin making the habits that lead to success! I'm off to practice what I preach : )

Planning

I've noticed my best days happen when I take the time to plan. Planning involves more than list making, although creating lists are a big part of it for me. I just spent almost a half-an-hour planning. Today it included making a menu for at least a week and from that making a grocery list, looking at my calendar and putting any events on my daily to-do list to keep them present in my mind (I've been known to forget many an activity), looking at what I want to accomplish and when I will do those things.

It is important to think thoroughly and detailed at these items if I want to be effective. I can stuff my daily to-dos full of things that would be nice to accomplish but at the end of the day it only leaves me feeling unproductive and frustrated. I've learned to be realistic and only write down those things I really want to accomplish. That way I can commit to those items and begin my day with determination to finish the list.

I noticed this crazy phenomenon when I have become more consistent in my planning, scheduling and execution: my children follow my lead. If I am haphazard about my day, everything is harder. It's harder to get the kids to clean, do school, follow anything I say. When I try to stay on task, my kiddos follow suit. Sometimes it's not fair I think that so much depends on us moms. If mama ain't happy, ain't nobody's happy--that kind of thing. Sometimes I wish I could just be grumpy! But when you look at the other side of coin, isn't nice to have much of the power to create wonderful days and happy children?

Don't Judge A Book By It's Cover

I'm reading How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie and I have been pleasantly surprised. I'm not sure what I was expecting, but he tells great stories to make his points and I have been not only entertained but instructed as well. In the book, he gives suggestions on how to make the study of this book most effective. One tip is to read the chapter twice. Initially, I thought that would be cumbersome but I have actually enjoyed it. It's amazing how much I miss the first time through and like I mentioned his stories are impactful and touching--definitely worth a second read.

His first three "fundamental techniques to handling people" are: 1. Don't criticize, condemn or complain, 2. Give honest and sincere appreciation and 3. Arouse in the other person an eager want. It's funny, but I again anticipated reading this with the intent of applying his advice in dealing with people in my commonwealth school and other more professional settings, but I find my mind drifting continually to my children. I have read Part I in it's entirety twice now and my children kept returning to my mind.

Equally as unfortunate is my inability to apply Rule #1! It seems like too frequently I slip back into a mom that thinks she needs to "nip things in the bud" before they develop bad habits when in reality no one likes to be criticized. If someone tells me I did a lousy job at something, my first reaction is NOT, "Oh you're right, I want to do that better next time!" It automatically puts people on the defensive instead of them opening up and deciding to change on their own. I need to make a picture in my house crooked or put a string on my finger as a reminder to keep checking myself because sometimes I respond in negative ways as naturally as if I'm taking a breath.

I think I'm pretty adept at Rule #2 Give honest and sincere appreciation. I've practiced that over the years and I think I do OK although I'm sure there is always room for improvement : ) It's number 3 that I'm still trying to wrap my brain around. "Arouse in them [again my children instantly come to mind] an eager want." Wow, if I could bottle that I think I'd become a millionaire overnight! Can you imagine not having to ask your children to make their beds or do their kitchen jobs because they already WANT to do them? I think that section deserves a third read.

The Whole Truth

I am in the middle of a moment where things I've been reading, studying, listening to and pondering along with life experiences are all culminating into a mega epiphany. Having this experience serves as a red flag for me to write! The best way I know of to really grasp and internalize a new principle is to write about it.

Today I was listening to a classic conference call from LEMI entitled “SayGoBeDo” which in a nutshell talks about following inspiration, promptings and/or revelation from God. For example, we may have a thought to call a friend or have a feeling to spend time with a child. During the discussion one of the mentors said, “To become charactered, we need to be motivated by serving others.” When I heard that all the pieces of the puzzle came together perfectly and I saw truth clearly.

The whole purpose I am seeking to educate myself and my children is to help us develop or become charactered. And yet as I read Bonds That Make Us Free: Healing Our Relationships, Coming to Ourselves (yes I’m still working on that one) and Leadership and Self-Deception: Getting out of the Box by the Arbinger Institute, I learn that how I regard others or how I truly feel about them will be communicated to them regardless of what I am actually saying.

In Leadership and Self-Deception in teaching this principle, one of the characters asks this poignant question, “When you’re going out of your way to do all those things for Leon so that he’ll know you have an interest in him, what are you most interested in—him or his opinion of you?” Yikes! If I am painfully honest with myself I would have to say the latter would answer for the majority of my interactions with others. I am having a sort of out-of-body experience lately as I see myself communicate with others in such a self-centered way. It’s as if my mind knows what is right but my body is on auto pilot just doing what it has always done and there seems to be no way to stop it!

Of course that is not true. Recognition is the first step to change. As I practice getting “out of the box” or viewing others as fellow human beings with hopes and struggles just like me, I can focus outward and serve others on a more meaningful level which is truly my heart’s desire. Practice makes perfect : ), right?

Heart at Peace

I just finished participating in an introductory series of webinars for the Leadership Education Family Builder program offered by Diann Jeppson and Jodie Palmer (which I highly recommend for those of you who are applying a TJEd philosophy in your homes). The first session focuses on our first job as parents to build, nurture and heal relationships in our family. They use the Arbinger Institute philosophy to show how to accomplish this job.

In the webinar, Jodie referenced an article entitled Parenting Pyramid you can download from their website and I would again highly recommend it and any of their books. The Arbinger Institute's main premise is that there are two ways to do anything--with a heart at peace or a heart at war. When your heart is at war you treat others like objects while with a heart of peace you realize that others are human beings.

It is all too easy with 5 children to get caught up in getting things checked off my list or herding my family around to various activities--too easily my children can become objects to move from here to there. I have really stilled myself in the last couple of weeks and made myself aware of my heart especially during morning devotional and learning time.

This has helped me to create and nurture quality relationships with my children. All of our learning has been more effective as we focus on treating each other with respect. Morning devotional (minus a two-year old) is more peaceful.

However, I should have entitled this post "No Pain, No Gain" since I have been seeing myself through different eyes and what I see is PAINFUL. As I read Bonds That Make Us Free: Healing Our Relationships, Coming to Ourselves by C. Terry Warner (an Arbinger Institute book), I see a little too clearly what a self-centered person I really am!! Ouch! Caution: Read this book when you feel good about yourself ; )

What is most fascinating is how our perceptions and experiences create a reality (that is NOT reality) in our interactions with others. We project our own ideas onto others' motives and create painful interactions with those we love! Maybe I'll post some realizations when they aren't quite so painful...

Messy

I feel like I am in a mess! I'm not talking about my house being any messier than usual, just my life. I am in the process of implementing new ideas and fine tuning old ones. I should look at it as if I were cleaning out a closet...it always gets messier before you see the floor.

Here's what I'm changing or trying to:

*First I posted about schedules. That post was really pretend. I have only had one day since then that I actually followed it close enough to my liking. I'm still refining that one. The day we actually had "blanket time"--I LOVED it! I could actually read a book and I learned how to knit (well started to anyway...my daughter was reading over my shoulder just now and gave me a questioning look ; ). That is a definite keeper. I'm finding it all comes down to my self-discipline which is quite frankly gestating right now.

*I started to be a little Lazy copycat. I have implemented her morning and evening cards and I'm LOVING them. The cards help me teach the little ones what they need to learn to do by themselves and provide an accountability for the older ones who are perfecting these skills. Like everything new thing I begin there is a learning curve. It took us a week to get the routine down. I'm working on consequences to encourage prompt action.

*I am maintaining the two closets I have gutted out and organized--my master bedroom closet and the homeschool closet. Upkeep is far easier than my signature Zorro way of cleaning.

*I don't think I've mentioned quite enough lately how LEMI (Leadership Education Mentoring Institute) has enhanced and improved my life. The latest is Tiffany and Aneladee's conference call on "The 5 Levels of Communication". Can I say WOW!? I listened to it for the first time last year but this time I heard it. They outline five levels that we navigate when communicating with others. The fifth level is where our needs and the needs of our loved ones and/or those we mentor are met. Getting to the fifth level takes trust, humility, stillness and LISTENING. Let's just say I am working out a muscle somewhere deep in my ear that hasn't been used near as much as it should.

*I'm also loving and taking care of plants in my basement. It is so exciting for the kids and probably mostly for me to see them sprout and watch them grow. Positively healing after the snow we received last night! With my past gardening history I am concerned for their welfare. Will they survive? Will they help me to be a more careful and diligent gardener since I've known them since birth? I will keep you posted on their fate.

These are a few of the concepts and ideas I'm wrestling with. I'm beginning to see that this whole process is really LIFE. Life is messy and we are blessed enough to see a glimpse of godly order here and there and strive for that. I am a fighter and will always strive for order...it's my Zorro way : )

Sacred Time

A pep talk to myself (feedback welcome):

I am just getting a handle on the idea of our home education time being "sacred". Ideally, between 8 a.m. and 2 p.m. in my home should be sacred, uninterrupted time where my children and I focus on learning. I say "ideally" because inevitably there are some interruptions. First, there is the phone. Most of my family and friends do not call during those hours or if they do, they know I probably won't answer. I am tempted at times, knowing it will be a "quick" conversation just to answer it and check it off my list so to speak. More times than not my quick conversation transforms into a 20-minute correspondence that could have been received later on in the day.

Secondly, I should exercise self-control and schedule my computer time for before or after school hours (except today when my mom comes : ) It is so tempting to check something real quick throughout the day but again that usually leads to a 20-minute diversion.

Lastly, there is the possible participation in events or service that is worthy of consideration. This is the most difficult for me. A friend needs me to take her kids for an hour (which historically turns into a play day for my children) or there is another event that is scheduled during those hours, i.e. service project, etc. Sometimes these things could be used as school material, but unless I can honestly say my children will learn from them, do I sacrifice our sacred time for them?

I suppose it is a case of "good, better, best". There are many good things that I can be involved in, but if it comes at the price of the best things, then I am putting the most important priority (in this case my children) second and sometimes last. That is inconsistent with my goals and dreams. I choose the best part!

MAJOR Breakthrough, Part II

As recommended by Smith and Assaraf, I wrote a page (which has turned into two!) of positive affirmations that I read three times a day. These are powerful, present-tense statements of what I would like to be, develop, obtain, wish for and desire. One of my positive affirmations, for example, is "I go to bed by 9:30 or 10:00 every night and sleep soundly for a sufficient time (notice the wording to allow for baby awakenings : ). I wake up at 5 am refreshed and motivated to complete my goals."

Now at this point you may be thinking, "If I said that, it would be a lie!" I often felt the same way as I said these things and went to bed late and got up late. However I realized from truths I learned from studying that I could be patient. I would believe that change was coming.

So each day I would say my positive affirmations and be gentle with myself letting go of negative energy or thoughts about myself. Then one day it happened! I began reading another classic The 7 Habits Of Highly Effective People - Powerful Lessons In Personal Change, Restoring The Character Ethic by Steven R. Covey for probably the fourth time (another book I have yet to finish ; ). This time was different though. Instead of reading his thoughts and thinking it was true but somehow elusive to me, something clicked.

I read that being proactive (the first habit) is keeping commitments and promises to myself and others. I decided I could do that. I could keep one promise to myself this week. I chose getting up at 5 am since many of my other desires would fall into place if I could achieve that one (i.e. time to exercise and study, etc.).

Last week I got up everyday at 5 am and it was EASY...way TOO easy! One of those mornings while I was reading my positive affirmations I received a huge revelation. I had been training my unconscious mind to accept these new ideas for months. Now when I chose to make the decision with my conscious mind, my body knew just what to do. I actually had a feeling of relief, as if my body was saying, "Finally!"

I'm nearing the end of my second week and I have kept that promise to myself even when a couple of nights I stayed up a little too late. Again I am gentle with myself and allow myself to take a cat nap if possible to show respect for my body. I am blown away at my ability to accomplish tasks that just a couple of weeks ago seemed insurmountable.

We are our own obstacles. I believe we have an immense power that we can access by creating pathways in our minds. We are created in God's image which means we have incredible potential! Let's get out of our own way!!

MAJOR Breakthrough, Part I

Last week was most definitely up there with the BEST weeks of my life!!!!! To tell you why I have to give some background...

Ever since I began to homeschool, I felt like there was so much that I wanted to have happen in my own life and in the life of my family. In reality I felt like all I could do was stay afloat and put out occasional fires. How was I going to change so drastically to become the person I needed to be to offer my children a quality education!?

I began my search for an answer to this seemingly unanswerable question. My journey began in the classics. I read books such as The One Minute Teacher: How to Teach Others to Teach Themselves by Spencer Johnson and As a Man Thinketh by James Allen (an absolute gem!). I listened to a CD of Napoleon Hill my husband had. Our book group read The Jackrabbit Factor: Why You Can by Leslie Householder and The Answer: Grow Any Business, Achieve Financial Freedom, and Live an Extraordinary Life by John Assaraf and Murray Smith. All these books and along with scripture and prayer helped to shift my existing paradigm and give me hope for my desire to teach my children.

The Answer: Grow Any Business, Achieve Financial Freedom, and Live an Extraordinary Life was probably one of the most life changing books for me and I didn't even finish it! The first 8 chapters are dedicated to a clear explanation of how our brains function and why we limit ourselves with self-defeating thoughts and behaviors.

Smith and Assaraf explained that our unconscious brain is in charge of 96-98% of all our body does. Right now we are breathing, our hearts are beating, millions of cells are being destroyed and millions are being created all without us even thinking about it. In fact our conscious brain is in charge of only 2-4% of all we do. The authors estimate the average adult's attention span is 6-10 seconds! Can you imagine if our conscious brain was in charge of our unconscious brain's duties. "Don't forget to breathe! Is my heart beating? OK, now walk!" Within 6-10 seconds we would be dead!

Now when we think about the goals and dreams we want to accomplish, we do this with our CONSCIOUS brain...the one that has A.D.D.! We wonder why we fail when the desire of our hearts is to SUCCEED. Instead of trusting our conscious brain to follow through with these important tasks we need to program and/or reprogram our unconscious to carry out our goals.

Assaraf and Smith explain that our unconscious can be programmed visually, audibly and emotionally. They suggest creating a vision board with pictures and words that would illustrate and support your dreams and goals. In addition to this, the authors suggest writing positive, present-tense statements that describe what you want to become. They encourage you to piggyback these statements with an emotion of when you were successful or happy in your past. Assaraf uses an example of when he scored a winning touchdown for his high school football team. Reliving those emotions while reciting your positive affirmations help to cement them in our unconcious mind.

I'm sure you want to know what happened next...but since we've exceeded our attention spans I'll finish the story in Part II. Stay tuned!

My Random Thoughts on the New Year

Happy New Year!! I always love the new year partly because it's my birthday ; ) but mostly because I love a fresh start! I enjoy taking stock of the last year and pondering who I really want to become this year.

I was thinking about how I always start with such grand ideas of things I want to accomplish or change about myself only to be disppointed with how human I am. I thought of how my sister-in-law was so annoyed in January last year at how packed the gym was. She said this happened every year and by February everything calmed down again.

After reading The Answer: Grow Any Business, Achieve Financial Freedom, and Live an Extraordinary Life by John Assaraf and Murray Smith, I learned people have a tendency to peter out on their goals because of their negative self-talk. We actually tell ourselves we cannot succeed even though success is the desire of our hearts. You've heard it before, "I just can't lose this weight!" "I always do that." Etc. So according to Asaraf and Smith we actually program our sub-concious NOT to help us achieve our goals.

After reading that book I wrote a couple of pages of positive statements I tell myself everyday. Prior to this I felt stagnant but literally my progess skyrocketed after only a short time of saying my postive affirmations (3xs/day). Every morning I look forward to visiting my whole self (on paper).

So as I ponder my new goals (which are really old ones just revisited) I am hopeful. Then my husband shared a story of a woman who was trying to quit smoking for the rest of her life. A friend suggested she quit just for today. Then quit again tomorrow. She was able to do it one day at a time.

I think God made the day and night as a mini fresh start for us. You know what they say about eating an elephant... Just for today I am a fun homeschool mom who speaks kindly to her children and has a quality relationship with each of them. I can do that just for today...

Building Relationships

I am currently reading Three Cups of Tea: One Man's Mission to Promote Peace . . . One School at a Time by Greg Mortenson and David Oliver Relin. I recommend this book to everyone! Greg Mortenson is one ordinary guy that is changing the world. Here is an excerpt from the back cover:

"In 1993 a mountaineer named Greg Mortenson drifted into an impoverished Pakistan village in the Karakoram mountains after a failed attempt to climb K2. Moved by the inhabitants' kindness, he promised to return and build a school. Three Cups of Tea is the story of that promise and its extraordinary outcome. Over the next decade Mortenson built not just one but fifty-five schools--especially for girls--in the forbidding terrain that gave birth to the Taliban. His story is at once a riveting adventure and a testament to the power of the humanitarian spirit."

The whole book has been inspiring and yet another testimony to me that we all have a special mission here on this earth and God will help us to fulfill that mission. One of the most significant parts of the book is during the construction of the first school. He is so uptight that construction goes according to plan that he is standing over the workers and checking every detail being, in short, rather annoying to the villagers. His mentor and village leader, Haji Ali, takes him aside and says:

"If you want to thrive in Baltistan, you must respect our ways. The first time you share tea with a Balti, you are a stranger. The second time you take tea, you are an honored guest. The third time you share a cup of tea, you become family, and for our family, we are prepared to do anything, even die," he said, laying his band warmly on Morenson's own. "Doctor Greg, you must make time to share three cups of tea..."

Mortensens says, "Haji Ali taught me the most important lesson I've ever learned in my life. We Americans think you have to accomplish everything quickly...Haji Ali taught me to share three cups of tea, to slow down and make building relationships as important as building projects. He taught me that I had more to learn from the people I work with than I could ever hope to teach them."

As we begin home education (I like that better than home schooling ; ) again this week, I am once again struggling to slow down and connect with my children. I am trying to find the balance between what I envision "has to be done" with making them not the task the most important thing.

What has help to shift your paradigms? How do you focus on relationships in your home? Any feedback will be like manna...

Personal Power

I participated in yet another life-changing conference call with the folks at LEMI. The topic of the call was Personal Power which Tiffany and Aneladee defined as (in a nutshell) the ability to manage our state of being. This call has truly been a treasure that I have been seeking. I may not have referred to it in those words. I may have had pieces of the puzzle already. However, they put a name on my desire and gave me all the pieces I need to develop it in my own life.

Here are the key points of what I learned. They began by sharing four states of being (the first three from Plato and the last from Stephen Covey). By recognizing our levels in each of these states, we can trigger or return to a state of courage or personal power.

1. Physical State
When we are in a state of receiving, we are in a state of courage because we become open to truth.
It is important to recognize when you receive best: studying in bed vs. sitting at a desk, in pajamas vs. fully dressed, etc.
If you feel you are in a disempowered state--MOVE YOUR BODY!!! This changes the physical state the quickest.

2. Emotional State
Listen to the story you are telling yourself and if it is negative--stop it, control it, change it.

3. Mental State
Be present and be REAL!

4. Spiritual State
A process that begins with courage and humility with love being its fruit.

Tiffany and Aneladee gave detailed descriptions of each of these states as well as used stories and examples to illustrate the principles clearly. I have only a simple summary of great truths they shared but hopefully you get the idea that we have the power to manage how we act even when a storm is raging around us. Developing personal power puts us in a place of choice, on a positive frequency, in a state of pro-action and courage, and helps us be unafraid to feel feelings.

Not only do I now have the tools to practice personal power, little by little I am sharing with my children how they can manage their state. Now that's power!

Confessions of A Time Abuser

Hello my dear friends!

Where in the world have I been!? My last post was October 1st. Well, my computer was fried by a power outage a few weeks ago and my only other means of reaching the world wide web is through my husband's work computer. Unfortunately he has to work ; ) and I have only had snippets of time to check my email (if I'm lucky). Why not buy a new computer some may ask? Since I am being a good steward over my finances I have decided to only buy it with cash of which I haven't quite enough...yet.

I wanted to share an insight I gained by not having a computer. Wow! I waste a TON of time on the computer!! Only having a short time to get my business done, I came up with a system to help me get the most out of my computer time. Every time I think I need to use the computer, I make a list of the activities I need to do. Throughout the day I add things on the list, i.e. email a friend, check the price of an item, pay bills, etc. Then when I get my minute on the computer, I go down my list and can literally get through it in less than 1/2 hour!

Time management is a skill I've been trying to develop and loosing my computer taught me how to schedule my time more efficiently. In order to fulfill our missions on this earth, we need to be master over our schedule so we do the most important things first. I'm so grateful for power outages and hard life lessons (well almost...)

You, Not Them Illustrated

Another fun example of the principle of "You, Not Them". My husband and I decided to put our mattress on the ground to see if that would help our lower backs from hurting. That morning I walked into my sons' room and this is what I found...

Create Community

Rachelle DeMille shared this video clip at a Thomas Jefferson Education Conference last year. I was really touched by the message. When applied to education this clip speaks volume about our roles as parents. We need to create a strong community of educated adults to mentor our children! We cannot do it alone...

Thomas Jefferson Center for Constitutional Studies

Check out the new blog for the Thomas Jefferson Center for Constitutional Studies !

Click W. Cleon Skousen's Healing of America

Dryer Lint

In several seminars I've attended with LEMI and at George Wythe University I have heard this proverb or saying:

The way you do one thing is the way you do everything.

I was thinking about that this morning when I emptied my dryer lint. My husband is always trying to get me to do it after every load, but I like to have something to grab onto not just scrape the lint off. So often to his dismay I wait too long to remove it. I was thinking this morning how that sums up the way I do a lot of things. For example, I will wait until my desk is piled high with papers before I will pay attention to it. I read in an organizing book once that I am a "Zorro" house cleaner. I attack a job with zeal and enjoy seeing the great change only to let it pile up soon after, then I repeat the whole process over again. A very exhausting approach that causes the cleaning process to happen only when the mess can't be tolerated any longer.

So my thoughts are, should I put away the mask and change my natural tendencies? I think it is important to recognize that I like to accomplish things in chunks of time rather than a little here and a little there. This knowledge could be helpful if I recognize when writing, for example, I do better if I have a chunk of time to get my thoughts on paper then I know I need to schedule it. But honestly, in the life I lead, I do not have chunks of time to devote to things like house cleaning or tracking my finances. I really only have little gifts of time to accomplish these tasks.

In contemplating this I remembered that my friend Tamera was telling me she liked the post "It's a Snap!". Funny...I should take my own advice. So I had a wonderful idea. I could capitalize on my Zorro tendencies and attack a bunch of little jobs with zeal by thinking, "This is a snap!" Do you think I can do it? I would stay on top of things and expend less energy.

I probably sound like I'm repeating myself but really I'm wrestling with the natural man. I have a clear picture of who I want to be and I'm determined to come off conqueror. Afterall, I have Zorro-like tendencies ; ) I think I could possibly start enjoying scraping the dryer lint off the screen thing...and I'll have a really happy hubby ; ) I feel a positive affirmation coming on...

Stewardship

Webster's Dictionary defines stewardship as "the conducting, supervising, or managing of something; especially : the careful and responsible management of something entrusted to one's care." I have recently learned a very painful experience about that word.

After procrastinating updating my Money program with all of my recent purchases and paying my bills, I finally sat down to do one of my least favorite jobs (afterall it was in my chore pocket and I had to set a good example ; ) To my dismay, the program had somehow been updated and when I restored the backup file, I realized that I hadn't backed-up since the middle of April!! I had to go in and manually enter every purchase, bill and deposit in the last four months. It took me two days (with interruptions of course) of sitting at my desk tediously re-entering all that data.

You may be asking, "What does this have to do with inspiring children?" My reply, EVERYTHING!! I alluded to it in the post with my sis-in-law's beautiful shelves. If we are master of our stewardships, then we will be free to inspire our children and fulfill our missions. Tiffany Earl shared this concept in the LEMI Parent Mentoring Conference Calls I participated in last year. Our stewardships may include our bodies, time, home, finances, family (with all the different relationships), church responsibilities, etc. If we are out of control on these most basic areas of our lives, we will not be available to be instruments in God's hands.

So although it was painful to re-enter all of my financial information, I learned some very valuable lessons.

• I am out of control with my finances and I need to work on disciplining myself not only keeping track of what I spend but how I spend it!
• I have to get back to the basics--first things first. Imagine what I will be able to accomplish when I have my basic stewarships under my control and them not controlling me!
• When I don't carefully manage my stewardships, I lose valuable time. My husband played with the children while I finished updating Money last night. I could have played with them and created memories with my family.
• Whether I like it or not, my children are watching me. They see Mom freaking out about the hard job I made for myself because of my poor management.
• Last but definitely not least, I backup after every entry ; )

It gives me hope that God has entrusted me with the stewardships I have. That means He will help me and in the strength of the Lord I can do all things!